How to not Stress about Getting Pregnant – Tips to Deal with Disappointment

Nov 22, 2021

Many women, dreaming of a child, are so concentrated on the conception that they can turn life into torture. How to get rid of obsessive thoughts about pregnancy and finally relax? How to not stress about getting pregnant? – Start with muscle relaxation, do not force sex, walk more and do what pleases you. This article will go through these and other tips, which can help you deal with the disappointment of not conceiving.

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Why Don’t Healthy Women Get Pregnant Right Away

Pregnancy depends on many reasons and takes some time. For example, it is known that the easiest way to get pregnant is by making love 3-4 times a week. But a break of more than five days can negatively affect the quality of sperm.

In addition, a lot depends on the lifestyle of the parents – stress and heavy workload reduce fertility in both men and women. Unsurprisingly, many successful pregnancies began during family vacations.

How to Stop Obsessing about Pregnancy?

It is not an easy task because the thoughts of pregnancy can haunt you constantly. You can envy your friends with children and expectant mothers; you can perceive your next period as a disaster.

Thousands of women have the same question is spinning in their heads, “Why can’t I get pregnant if everything is okay with gynecology?” To increase the chances of motherhood, these women calculate a fertility window – a good time for conception (5 days before ovulation and its first day). And when the fertility window opens, they demand sex from their husband. Do not flirt, do not seduce, but precisely demand! To what consequences does this lead?

Perhaps you have been trying to get pregnant for more than one month. Of course, you know that there are not so many “good days” for this, and sometimes you have to make love literally on a schedule because it HAS TO BE done on a certain date. And all to no avail! The standard advice from friends and family trying to cheer you up is not to think about it.

But how can you follow this advice when you involuntarily return to thoughts of ovulation and the menstrual cycle throughout the day? After all, this is inevitable for every woman who dreams of a baby. And you do want to become a mother so much! But the miracle does not happen.

Psychological Blockage of Conception

Can an unhealthy fixation on getting pregnant affect women’s health and fertility?

Possibly. Any negative emotions – anger, jealousy, sorrow, anxiety – cause tension in the body. And the body tension provokes and maintains emotional stress. Constant thoughts about getting pregnant, like “Am I infertile?” also affect well-being. Hormone levels, endocrine balance, and even fertility can change.

The longer the obsessive thoughts about pregnancy spin in one’s head, the stronger the bodily response to this anxiety is: muscles tighten, uterus too. The body gets bound by fear and anxiety, and how can a child enter a closed door?! It turns out that a woman dreams of a baby on a conscious level, but on a subconscious level, she puts muscle barriers and does not allow conception to happen.

Therefore, go towards your goal without undue stress. Loosen your hold; try to stay spiritually free.

Don’t Turn Sex into Hard Work

I’ve been trying to get pregnant for two years, but it didn’t work. There are no problems with gynecology. Maybe the cause of infertility is a bad relationship with my husband? He says he is tired of “making children” and that sex has become hard work. Because of this, we have arguments all the time.

Quarrels with your husband do affect conception. The body understands that the family situation is explosive, no time for children! Consequently, it blocks ovulation. Therefore, you need to think not of making a child quickly but restoring relationships with your husband first. 

After all, forcing physical intimacy (even for the sake of a baby) is a form of violence that nobody likes. In addition, by becoming overly assertive, active, aggressive, a woman can produce too much testosterone, which influences ovulation and prevents them from getting pregnant.

Do Pleasant Things that Help You Relax

How to not stress about getting pregnant? Forget about the fertility window, ovulation tests; do not endlessly seek information about why a woman cannot get pregnant. But how to calm down?!

It is difficult to relax in a state of anxiety. Start with muscle relaxation – then the emotional overload will also decrease. Walk more together with your close and dear, watch good, kind films, use acupressure because it perfectly relieves stress. For example, ask your beloved to massage your feet, legs, shoulders 2 hours before bedtime. In addition, massage is physical and emotional contact that will help you feel the care and tenderness of the partner.

Talk It Out to Deal with Disappointment of not Conceiving

You could have used contraception for several years and even worried about an unwanted pregnancy, but now that there are no obstacles in front of you, you cannot achieve what you want. And it almost drives you crazy.

Sometimes you can get madly angry, and sometimes, feel sad, nervous, or depressed. Or feel lonely. Some women do not tell anyone about their attempts to get pregnant because this is a very personal, intimate moment. All this resembles a vicious circle. The main thing in such a situation is to tune in to a wave of calmness and believe that everything will be okay. Of course, your loved one will give you a hand – talk, share your experiences, and do not forget that such moments bring you closer together.

How to Increase Your Chances of Conceiving a Baby

Possibly you had a desire to try all kinds of diets, procedures, and sex poses to get pregnant. But the best thing you can do is live a normal life. Make love, eat well, get plenty of sleep, and don’t stress yourself out. If less than 6-12 months have passed since the first attempt, you can try several life hacks.

Choose the optimal time for conception

Consult Fertility Experts

According to some reports, the day of ovulation and 2-3 days before it is best for conception. To find out when ovulation occurs, a rapid urinary test for luteinizing hormone will help – a day or two before ovulation, it will become positive. However, timing is not always the best option.

Fertility experts do not advise couples to calculate the optimal time for conception. As far as sex becomes scheduled, it transforms the life of a couple into one continuous stress. It is wiser to have sex 2-3 times a week throughout the cycle.

Do not use lubricants

Water, oil, and silicone-based lubricants reduce sperm survival. However, hydroxyethyl cellulose-based lubricants have less impact on sperm survival, so you can continue to use them if there is a lack of lubrication.

Quit diets

Sufficient nutrition is the key to a successful pregnancy. But overeating is also not worth it. Evidence shows that a body mass index (BMI) of 19-30 is ideal for pregnancy. Women who have more or less BMI need a longer time to conceive.

You can calculate your BMI manually by dividing your weight by your height squared. Alternatively, you can use online calculators or download a special application.

Quit smoking and alcohol

Smoking increases the risk of infertility by 1.6 times. It is also better not to drink too much alcohol. Consumption of more than 20 grams of ethanol per day increases the risks of infertility by 60%.

Sex position doesn’t matter

The position of the body during sex, based on the available data, does not affect the result in any way. The missionary position is as suitable for conception as any other.

Consult Fertility Experts

Fertility experts can help you understand how to not stress about getting pregnant. In general, you should wait at least one year before going to see your gynecologist. It would help if you did not rush to sad conclusions earlier than that. According to statistics, even completely healthy couples under 30 can conceive a child in the first three months in 20-37% of cases. Moreover, after six months, pregnancy occurs in 80% of couples.

Until a year has passed from the first attempt, there is no need to worry, be examined, and even more so to be treated. However, do not delay if you need to talk to someone. The specialist will listen and prescribe the necessary tests for you and your partner.

IVF and fertility experts


Is It Possible to Cure Infertility?

According to statistics, infertility is treated and quite successfully – according to statistics, children appear in 50% of women (without assisted reproductive technologies: IVF, etc.). On the other hand, success depends on many factors, from age and previous pregnancies to partner sperm problems. Many factors affect the ability to become pregnant, so it can be difficult to predict the result.

how to deal with not getting pregnant right away

If the problem is associated with being overweight or underweight, it is often sufficient to normalize the weight for a successful pregnancy. True, the problem is often associated with sex hormones – in this situation, the doctor will select the appropriate medications. And if the problem is in the obstruction of the fallopian tubes or in the uterus itself, surgery may be required.

What if the treatment doesn’t work?

For patients for whom these treatment methods are not suitable or have not helped, in vitro fertilization (IVF) procedure is recommended.

During the IVF, the woman’s ovaries are stimulated with the help of hormones; then, her own egg or donor’s oocyte is taken and fertilized with the sperm. Then doctors grow the embryo in a special incubator and transfer it to the mother’s uterus. A baby is born in the same way as other children conceived naturally.

assisted reproductive techniques

However, it is important to understand that this is a complex method of treatment that requires serious preparation and gives the best result up to 40-45 years. It is difficult to predict how successful IVF will be. According to statistics, the procedure ends with the birth of a live and healthy baby in about 32% of cases.

At the same time, IVF success rates vary greatly in different countries and clinics in the same city. There are clinics where it is possible to achieve a positive result on the first try in 30-40% of cases.

Very often, mothers are worried about possible health problems that may arise in children conceived with IVF. But lately, there are fewer reasons for concern than 20 years ago.

When the method was just being created, all viable embryos obtained after fertilization were implanted in the mothers’ uterus just in case. Women often gave birth to twins or triplets. It is much more difficult to bear several children than one – and after all, mothers already had problems with pregnancy.

Today, the goal of the procedure is to give birth to one healthy baby, so mothers transfer only one, a maximum of two of the best embryos. As a result, the majority of children born after IVF are indistinguishable from their peers.

How to not Stress about Getting Pregnant – the Bottom Line

Female infertility is as common as male infertility. If you cannot get pregnant within a year, you need to be examined and sometimes treated with your partner.

Infertility is a complex diagnosis that can have many causes. However, after treatment, about half of women successfully become pregnant and give birth to healthy babies (without IVF).

IVF is a fairly effective way to give birth to a healthy baby. However, one should make this decision after consulting an obstetrician-gynecologist or a reproductologist. If you have any questions or want to know more about advanced fertility services, don’t hesitate to use free consultancy with one of our experts. We are always here to help.

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